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The Really? That Happened? Personal Aside and Back to School Nightmares, Share Yours

Heather says:

Yesterday I stood at my children’s bus stop for over an hour, eagerly waiting for their bus to drop them off. I was excited to hear about their first day.  Dripping sweat and with my phone battery dying I paced at the edge of the road, out in the sun.

Finally there was the bus.

There were a few kids, but I was confused because my children were. not. there.

The bus driver noted my obvious concern and distress and asked, “What bus are you waiting for?”

I told her.

She said, “That’s not this bus, that’s an entirely different route.” (For clarity: I had obtained the information from the school’s website.)

Controlling my panic, I asked the bus driver how I should locate my children (who have now been misplaced for well over an hour) and I immediately followed her recommendation to go to the school.

I showed up at the school, jumped out of the car, and went into the office which had the usual chaos of first day confusion (remember this is my first experience as a parent with kids in school).

My children were located, I was told to go home to wait, and that the other bus would drop them off at our house. This finally happened, a little over 2 hours after the children had been dismissed. Remember unairconditioned buses, in August, in the Lowcountry of SC?  The bus driver was kind and told me I should have gotten the information from the Open House. I let him know that I had attended and stood in the long bus line, only to be told, by a school employee, to get the information from the website. At that point he was irritated, too.

Naturally I called the bus office the moment they opened and I’m sitting here waiting on that return call. . . The bus driver who finally brought my kids home to me also let me know that I could request a more convenient stop, since the closest is more than 0.4 miles from our house. (The neighbor child’s mother and I are both quite relieved as the closest stop was on a highway that includes a walk on a busy road with no sidewalk and two blind corners. Yay rural life).

That phone better ring soon.

While I wait, and breathe, and try to remember it’s not the person I’ll be speaking to’s fault, entertain me with your back-to-school nightmares.

Share Your Best Back-to-School Tips / Ideas

Heather says:

Here’s a little transparency for you.

This is the first time my children are going to school and frankly, I think I’m more nervous and excited than they are. I have once mentioned that my oldest child is on the autistic spectrum (Asperger’s) and that he needed a couple of extra years at home to mature before he could adapt to a classroom environment. We used a virtual charter school system mostly because I needed the structure. My middle child also used this program, because I couldn’t wrap my brain around schooling one at home and not the other. This year all three will be school-age and now, with my working outside of the home, as well as here at Home-Ec101.com something had to give. Thankfully, everyone seems ready for next week. My house quiet after having three marauding minions stampeding around for the last 5 years 9 years in all) is mind-blowing.

As I usually do around the time change, I’ve begun moving their bedtimes to a more respectable one 15 minutes at a time. (This seems to cut down on the whining and bickering after lights out).

So today, since I’m the n00b, I ask you:

What is your best back-to-school tip or idea?

Just for fun, I’ll randomly select and send a digital copy of Home-Ec101: Skills for Everyday Living to someone  who comments (with an actual suggestion, First and Lulz, do not count).

Sunday Confessional with a Side of Site Admin

Heather says:

Let’s get the site adminstration stuff out of the way. Home-Ec101.com has been having some performance issues; my good friend Michael Carnell and I are working hard to make sure that we get it whipped into shape.

The comment system has been changed, IntenseDebate seems to have been a part of the problem, but certainly not the only cause. I have switched out to LiveFyre which seems to be lighter and faster. It also looks as though it has the ability to host a live chat, which intrigues me with the possibilities. Don’t worry, you’ll still have the ability to share via your Twitter or Facebook identities if that’s what floats your boat. If you just want to say hey and get on with your life that’s fine, too.

If you are used to using the categories in the sidebar to navigate, switch to the tag cloud. I’ve shuffled up the taxonomy of the site to help Google understand what Home-Ec101 is all about.

The forums have been closed temporarily, in case they are a part of the site issues. I’ll reopen them after I get back from Type-A Parent Conference.

Now, on to the confession part of the show.

I have two this week, one small and one that I’m not sure is exactly a confession, but it is something I’ve been struggling with for a long time.

The small one-

I got lazy about sharpening my knives AND I wasn’t paying attention to my chopping -there were a few extra neighbor kids bouncing in and out of my work area- I had a knife slip and took off a good chunk of the nail on my ring finger. It’s as attractive as it sounds. Knife skills are important, but attention and basic safety matter just as much.

Now the one I’m not sure is a confession and I hope doesn’t come across as a plea for attention. (See, there goes my neurotic side and I haven’t even managed to spit it out yet.) My oldest son has been diagnosed with a mild form of autism most commonly referred to as Asperger’s. For a long time, we didn’t want to put a label on him even though we knew that his mannerisms, while similar to our own, didn’t fit in with “normal.”

My son isn’t the type that shuns contact, he gloms onto it in a way that makes many people uncomfortable. He has no sense of personal space -which is ironic because my personal bubble is gargantuan. He’s incredibly articulate, his vocabulary rivals that of Anne Shirley. He lives in a world of his own creation, but he’s more than happy to tell you all the details, if you glance in his direction. It’s kind of cute when a 3 year old invites a perfect stranger over for dinner, it’s not so cute when he’s 7 and the size of your average 10 year old -he gets his height from Tim and I. He tends to  invite random adult strangers to spend the night and thankfully no one has taken him up on is offer. We’re dealing with the usual set of challenges with an atypical child with the added bonus of people assuming he’s much older.  We’re working with a psychologist to give him coping skills that neither limit who he is as an individual, but allow him to relate better to others.  Most of you know I’m very self-conscious, I won’t lie this stuff stresses me out like crazy.

So, it’s not exactly a confession, it’s just that I’m no longer going to keep that information private.

One of my goals is to be as honest as I can about life. There is joy to be found in the everyday, when we aren’t trying to make it fit some unrealistic ideal. I know people who took drastic measures when their version of reality didn’t match what they thought it should and this makes me look carefully at what I present to the world. I started this series to encourage people to admit that life isn’t magazine and tv perfect. Real life is messy, tiring, and wonderful at the same time. Sure you can’t really laugh at everything when it happens -like if you step in dog vomit before coffee- but the rest of us can. After the irritation wears off, it’s time to share and laugh at what we all go through in our day to day lives. On the internet it’s all too tempting to share the cropped and photo-shopped version of our lives (the one where all of my kids behave perfectly all the time), but that isn’t my reality. Is it yours?

So Home Eccers, I ask, what do you have to get off your chest?

New Year’s Eve, The Retrospective

Heather says:

Tonight we’re having a geek in, because that’s how we roll in the Solos house. What is that? Another couple is coming over with their laptops. There’ll be food and drinks, video games, and geek talk. At midnight I’m sure there’ll be a toast. Just don’t tell anyone that my husband specifically requested that Velveeta Chili Dip. I told him I [insert obnoxious head toss / hair flip] have an image to maintain and he’d have to make that grocery run -I kid. Mostly.

I want to thank all of you for being a part of the Home Ec 101 community. As it turns out, 2010 was a big year for Home Ec 101 and here are the numbers:

  • 278 new posts which brings the total to just shy of 1600
  • 532k+ unique visits
  • 856k+ page views

This doesn’t even count that I wrote Home Ec 101 the book over the first half of the year. Six months later I still can’t believe I made it through and managed to continue producing for the site at the same time. -I will admit, there were a few very rough weeks in the spring and I really can’t thank my husband enough for understanding that I was stretched to the limit and some things had to slide.

Let’s look back at some of the posts from 2010:

January:

Mattress Cleaning and Other Indoor Sports -this post was picked up by Lifehacker, which was extremely flattering, even if I was writing about dust mites doing the nasty.
In the kitchen Balsamic Glazed Roast Chicken was my favorite recipe.

February:

I had a brief appearance on a local morning show and was asked to demonstrate the kind of recipes I would be teaching in a workshop. I wrote One Baking Sheet and Dinner for 2 which went over quite well. (I should probably do a few more of these meal ideas, huh?)

Just for fun I ran a contest asking for Home Ec 101 Readers’ Favorite Tightwad Tips. The comments are invaluable, enjoy.

March:

Cleaning Tips from Home Ec Readers and Short Ribs Braised in Beer are my favorite posts from this insanely busy month, but don’t miss Food Labels, Controversy, and MSG or Dishing on HFCS.

April:

It was at some point during this month where I was asked how I could call Home Ec 101 a frugal website. My response [spoiler alert] is now the introduction to the book: A Day Late, A Dollar Short, No More: Life Skills are Frugal.

May:

Homemade Granola, Stewed Chicken, and Sour Smelling Towels

June:

I’ll admit, this month was hard, I’d gotten a little behind on my final deadline, the house sort of fell apart, and I was pretty much a stressed out mess. I received an email from a reader, the comments still choke me up. This is one where you helped me more than I can ever express: A Little Friday Encouragement from a Reader.

Customizing the Chore Routine is one of my favorite discussions on the entire site.

If you’re hungry, there’s Lowcountry Boil and don’t forget How to Sharpen Your Knives.

July:

How to Cut Up a Whole Chicken is one of the most popular posts on the entire site. I’m not sure it will ever catch up to Tomato Pie, but who can compete with bacon?

We prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse -you know I’m teasing, right?- by learning How to Use a Charcoal Grill and to Stock an Emergency Pantry.

August:

Things finally slowed down in August -can you call it slowing down if you drive cross-country with 4 kids?- and as you can imagine, I celebrated by doing more in the kitchen (much to the annoyance of some). Chili honey chicken thighs and drop dumplings were my favorite. I also stumbled upon a debate I didn’t know existed: Beet Sugar vs Cane Sugar.

September:

How to Cook with Dried Beans, Passive Composting, and the Voluntary Ban on Phosphorous in Dishwasher Detergent were just a few of the riveting articles. I never said Home Ec was sexy.

October:

How to Choose Freezer Friendly Recipes and How to Use Bleach Safely are tops for October 2010.

November:

As usual we did the Countdown to Turkey Day series, which will be available as an email service next year -in time for our Canadian friends. (I’m excited about that). In addition to that was Saving Money with Powdered Milk and in the bathroom there are Tips for Toilet Cleaning. Oh the fun we have.

December:

We wrapped up 2010 with an Introduction to Plungers, a discussion on the effectiveness on vinegar as a disinfectant, and we can’t forget those Nutella No Bake Oatmeal Cookies.

Thank you all for your comments and your encouragement over the past year. Without the emails, tweets, phone-calls, and occasional late night venting sessions on Skype, I don’t know that I could have managed to accomplish half as much.

If 2011 is half as fun or productive, it shall go down as a win.

I still can’t find a better way to mark the end of the year than the words of Ella Wheeler Wilcox, so enjoy the flashback:

What can be said in New Year rhymes,
That’s not been said a thousand times?
The new years come, the old years go,
We know we dream, we dream we know.
We rise up laughing with the light,
We lie down weeping with the night.
We hug the world until it stings,
We curse it then and sigh for wings.
We live, we love, we woo, we wed,
We wreathe our prides, we sheet our dead.
We laugh, we weep, we hope, we fear,
And that’s the burden of a year.

Happy New Year, my friends. May the New Year bring peace and joy to all those you hold dear.

Three Years of Home-Ec Goodness

Heather says:

I can’t believe I wrote this morning’s post and completely forgot to mention that today marks the third anniversary of Home-Ec101.com. A lot has been covered in that time, but what amazes me is how much there is to learn and share. There is so much more I want to cover, like household maintenance and garment repair. I’d like to touch on basic gardening and preservation. It seems the more lifeskills I learn while developing this site, the more I want to share.

I want to thank all of you for being a part of the community. Your comments, questions, and encouragement are what keep me going.

Just think, next year at this time, we’ll be gearing up for the launch of the Home-Ec 101 book!

I feel like I’m on a roller coaster and the ride has just begun.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggety Jig

Heather says:

Coming home from a long trip is hard. While I’m thankful I had to have the house company ready, I am still facing a monster pile of laundry, unpacking and a nearly empty refrigerator.

I am a creature of habit, I have routines I like to follow and starting today I’m re-launching #backontrack. If you are on Twitter, feel free to follow that hashtag and use it to tag your own endeavors to either establish a healthy routine whether it’s:

  • keeping track of a fitness goal
    exercising a certain amount per week, logging your efforts
  • improving your diet
    drinking more water, preparing food at home
  • increasing productivity
    getting to bed on time, breaking a bad habit

It’s a place to work on goals without annoying the crap out of our immediate family or close friends. Creating a sense of accountability within a positive community is helpful when making change. Knowing I ought to report in on my efforts can inspire me to load the kids into the car instead of planting myself on the couch. Looking at my calendar, January is packed with obligations and goals; I’m sure yours is, too. Let’s pull for each other.

Starting today, I resume normal posting here at Home-Ec 101. I hope you had a wonderful holiday season.

Been There, Done That: When a Baby Bird Leaves the Nest

The following is a guest post from Kathy Tyson, who has been there, done that and whose advice I’m more than happy to take.

Kathy says:
My oldest daughter was recently shoved out of the nest. She left kicking and screaming – very unhappy because I made her move into a college dorm room rather than have her face a daily commute. I mean come on! She got a full ride scholarship so why not enjoy it on campus? Besides, as anyone who has attended college anywhere in the U.S. know, parking is a son-of-a-gun!

But the real knife in her back was when we told her that she was losing the big room upstairs. Her little sister who started high school at the same time she started college was moving on up. One baby girl was elated, the other baby girl was highly peeved. The challenge was sifting through the piles and piles and tubs and tubs of stuff she left behind. Here are my tips on how to make a move like this:

mess1. Tell the kid moving out that whatever they leave behind needs to be presorted OR there’s no guarantee that their stuff won’t go into permanent storage … possibly never to be found again.

hangers2. You’ll be both delighted and horrified by what you find. The delight was when I discovered one daughter was highly organized at some point in her life. The horror was knowing that all those labeled hangers were empty so somewhere a fail occurred!

3. Crusty cat barf found behind the TV does come clean with Scrubbing Bubbles.

storage4. Big plastic garbage bags work almost as well as the $10 storage bins. Don’t be afraid to pile clothes you plan to donate to Goodwill or Salvation Army in trash bags. But you might want to put a masking tape label on them to be sure you don’t accidentally haul them to the curb.

mess25. Hidden among all the posters hanging on the wall may be little surprises

baby photos– pictures of you as a young Mommy holding your little precious – that could incite tears.

6. If you have allergies, the paper towels you’re already using are just as good as regular tissues!

paper paint7. When personal belongings have been packed and/or changed, you may discover that PAINT is the only solution to covering white board markers that strayed from the white board and stained the wall. Or is it? Look carefully and you’ll see where – in a crunch with company coming and no white paint – I taped plain white paper on the wall to cover the stains. That’s just how I roll, people. If you don’t have a solution to save yourself from embarrassment, invent one!

behind the door8. Finally, when you think you’re done you may be wrong. After the room was all put together, baseboards cleaned, cat barf eradicated, curtains, sheets & blankets washed, spider webs cleaned, and you *think* you’re done… you might discover you forgot to clean behind the door.

I still haven’t done it, either. I’ll get it done before our next round of company arrives!

To read more from Kathy visit her at Shak and Jill.

If you’re interested in contributing a guest post send an email to Heather@Home-Ec101.com.

It’s a Frugal Friday Free for All

Heather says:
There’s a lot on the Home-EC101 plate right now, so I’m opening the comments up our frugal friends. Have you recently written a post on frugality? If so, link to it in the comments.

Later today I’m heading back to Myrtle Beach, SC but this time it’s not for vacation, I’ve been helping organize the second CREATE South conference. If you are in the area, it’s free and Andre Pope is providing some fantastic BBQ. There, free and bbq have appeared together, can this paragraph get any better? I submit that it cannot. 

Speaking of Myrtle Beach, if you could please keep all of those who have lost their homes to the wildfire  in your thoughts. Always keep safety in mind and obey the law when burning out of doors. Lastly, while we’re thinking good thoughts, Ivy has been under the weather for a bit, leave her some love in the comments.

We’ll return to our normal schedule on Sunday.

Sunday Confessional: This Is How It Ends

retrochick.JPGIvy says:

My grandmother passed away at about 5 this morning. We’re sad that she’s no longer here on earth, but we rejoice since we know her name is written in the Lamb’s Book of Life and we will see her again one day in Heaven. As always, she was the polar opposite of my other grandmother and wound down very slowly, being off all ther tubes and IVs for the past 15 days. My confession: I’m relieved. This means things can get back to normal. A new normal, yes. One without my grandma. But one where everybody isn’t stretched so thin and we’re not all tired and somewhat angry. I feel the slightest bit bad that I feel relieved, but even as my tears fall for my lost grandmother, I know that she was one of the most practical people I have known and she would totally understand my relief.

And it’s a nice thought that she’s back to the grandma I have always known, not the hollow shell of herself that she had become these last few years because of dementia. She is no longer with us here on earth, but now I have both of my grandmas up in Heaven, looking down and keeping watch for me. That part feels good.

If I had been keeping up with my personal blog, I would give her a eulogy of sorts there, but since I haven’t posted there in more than a year, it feels false and wrong to do that there. So, I’ll do it here. Click if you want to read on.

[Read more...]

Ask The Audience: Scary Story Time

retrochick.JPGIvy says:

In case you were wondering, we’re not dead. For my part, we’re still watching and waiting while my grandmother dies. If you happen to be the praying sort, drop one for my dad- he’s having a very hard time watching his mother die so slowly. It’s odd to watch the reactions you get when trying to schedule something with someone. It’s like, “Well, my grandmother is about to die any minute now, so I’ll schedule, but I may have to reschedule in case she dies, OK?” People immediately go bug-eyed while I rush to finish the explanation that she’s been dying a very long, slow death and we’re hoping she passes away soon so she can be at peace finally.

I now finally understand why, when a friend of mine’s father died, she had us come to his funeral with her and she joked with us the entire time and we laughed our way through the funeral. I remember at the time not being able to fathom how she could be in such a happy mood when she had just lost her father, but her loss is a lot like my own impending loss- it is long and slow and painful, and when we know they’ve finally reached peace, we are happy for them.

So while I’ve been off dealing with that, Heather had a MAJOR scare with one of her kids. Her daughter is doing a lot better today, and Heather’s still (understandably) a bit shaken up. Send your good wishes her way, but let’s also cheer her up with some scary stories of our own.

I don’t have anything nearly as scary myself, but I remember being woken up in the middle of the night by what sounded like a seal when my oldest son was a baby. I went to his bed and saw him coughing and gasping for air. I grabbed him up and rushed him to the ER. Come to find out, he had the croup. They told me if it ever happened again, to go into the smallest bathroom we had with a shower and to turn the shower on full blast, as hot as possible and to let him breathe in the steam until he stopped coughing. I was glad I had that advice, because I was woken up with that horrible cough many times over the next couple of years, and I knew what to do.

I think that’s the hardest part in any scary situation, knowing what to do. When emergencies happen, I’m not good at an immediate reaction. I’m slow, need a minute to think things over. Luckily, in just about every emergency situation I’ve been in, I’ve either had that time to stop and think what I needed to do, or had someone with me who was a quick reactor.

So, tell us about the scary moments you’ve had in your life.