Ivy says:
I used to have a miserable life. I was unhappy with my marriage, my children, I was broke, and my house was a wreck. Seriously, this shining paragon of household knowledge you see before you once was completely miserable. I finally decided I had enough and decided to change my life, so I did.
It all seems overwhelming sometimes, and I have posted before about how you have to control the things you can control, and allow yourself to be imperfect. That’s all fine and well and good, but you also have to help yourself.
2 things really made a huge difference to me- both are a matter of “fake it ’til you make it”.
The first thing I did was plaster a smile on my face nearly all the time. Lo and behold, it put me in a more positive mood. It sounds stupid and you feel like a big jerk going around grinning when you’re really quite depressed, but it really works.
The other thing was to use “positive affirmations”. But not that, “I’m good, and I’m smart, and people like me” crap- unless you think it would really work for you. Think about the kind of person you want to be, and tell yourself you already ARE that person.
I’ll give you an example. It’s my oldest affirmation and is one I have been using off and on since I was about 19 years old. “I am one of the 2 coolest people I know.” I used to be the hugest nerd- or at least I felt that way. But when I started telling myself I was cool, I started feeling cooler, until one day I overheard some people talking about me- and they were saying I was so cool. Hee!
So, tell yourself you are the kind of person you want to be. Then set yourself in the direction of becoming that person. Like the saying goes, “God helps people that help themselves”. That’s exactly right.
Once your first positive affirmation starts working, start a new one, but keep telling yourself the old one. I’m on my third positive affirmation- I’m now working on “Money falls upon me like an avalanche”. It’s not working yet, but it’ll start, eventually.
Never give up. Never get discouraged. Dig in and get going, your life is awaiting you.
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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
You know, if you get hit by a Brinks truck I will laugh.
Just thought I’d tell you my new favorite pasttime is hovering my mouse pointer over your links to see what the little white boxes will say. I’ve not been disappointed!! Keep it up
Hee hee, Malia! You found our easter eggs!
Watch out- there’s an easter egg hunt coming soon.
I was just laughing at your hover buttons… “I am a complete idiot…” “But I’m making up for it now.” I love those! All of them!
What a great post!
I’m the 1,432nd coolest person I know, damnit and don’t try to tell me differently..
i do love how WP lets you put the easter eggs in the blog basket.
John, you’re at least in the top 1,420 of people *I* know. Of course, you probably know cooler people than I do.
Hey Ivy…I know you and you are definitely cooler than me..lol
have you read ‘The Secret’ yet? i’ve been telling my hsuband this (that we make our own reality) for yeaarrssss and he finally saw the movie fo this book and suddenly believes me. anyway it may be worth your looking into.
and, i think you shold totally own being a nerd. or at least a geek. nerddom is suddenly making its own cool. check this out- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerdcore_hip_hop
I am definitely owning my geekdom, that’s part of what makes me so cool!
I used to think it was a load of horse puckey, too. Then I took a look at the people I was surrounded by and began modeling some of my behaviors after those who were the happiest and gradually my life became easier.
I don’t mean my life has been puppies and rainbows ever since, certainly not. However I suddenly found the rough patches easier to muddle through.