Heather says:

File this one under, “Sometimes I really wish I had a normal 9-5 job so I could keep the days of the week straight.”

You know how on Sundays the chore chart reminds everyone to check their schedules?

I forgot.

This means I completely spaced, until five minutes ago, that I have jury duty this afternoon.

This being human thing? It’s for the birds.

So tell me, what air headed thing have you done lately? Hopefully they won’t take my phone away and your comments will entertain me until I have to pay attention. Oh and tomorrow? We leave for Minnesota, 24 hours in the car with kids, send some good thoughts in this direction and include some caffeine in those thoughts.

Heather says:

Holy cow, I had a heck of week. The up, down, crazy, sideways and what the heck am I doing kind of week. I know it’s Monday morning, but each time I opened my browser to start working on this week’s Sunday Confessional (which would have been long enough before Sunday came along) someone in my household lost their ever-loving-minds.

Most of you know what the Sunday Confessional series is, but for those who are newbies (oh hai! And welcome to Home Ec 101) it’s the series in which I try to point out that no one is ever going to get their lives magazine perfect. And I never want to contribute to anyone feeling like they are somehow less of a person because their homes and lives don’t match media and judgy mcjudgerson Internet Standards. The Sunday Confessional isn’t about celebrating mediocrity, it’s more about just admitting that no, we ALL have bad days or weeks. And I want to be sure you understand that we are almost always -in our heads at least- comparing our own absolute worst moments with other people’s best foot forward.

Last Monday I flew home from San Francisco where I had been meeting with the Method brand -and oh my, I cannot wait to tell you about that, I have never fallen in love with a company before and I have butterflies. . .  we talked chemistry and the environment and cleaning and and and post coming later today, I’ll stop gushing now.

Tuesday, I started my new job. I’m now a server in an Irish pub three nights a week. I love it, it’s exactly the kind of escape from startup / homeschooler / working from home life I needed. What I need now is a way to manage my time more effectively -the fact that it’s Monday and I’m writing Sunday’s post should say something. Friday another server called in and I was thrown into the Friday night rush on what should have been a training shift. That really wasn’t a big deal, I did serve for years in my past life, it was just a matter of having to cut myself some slack for not knowing all of the ins and outs of their computer system and hoping they’d cut me the same slack. I made it through. Saturday I picked up a shift because the server that called in had to be replaced. Let’s just say it ended up being a very, very late night thanks to the time change* and my children do not have a snooze button.

Sunday morning my dog ripped off a toenail and created a scene straight out of Dexter for me to clean up just a few minutes before I had to get the kids ready for Sunday school. You know, I really hope no one in my household disappears unexpectedly, I’ll have a lot of explaining to do when the crime scene people show up with the black lights. Yeah, the floor only got a lick and a promise kind of cleaning, the deep clean has to wait until tomorrow -hopefully.

Today? I have to figure out how to get all of these metaphorical juggling balls back into the air, maybe I’ll breathe after my shift ends tonight.

What about you? What do you have to get off your chest? I know it’s Monday, but we just had the time change, so we’re all running a bit behind.

*No, it wasn’t the kind of late night that results in a hangover, it was just a late night running my mouth with actual adults.

Heather says:

People new to Home Ec may wonder what this series is about. I started the Sunday Confessional a few years ago when I realized how it was way too easy to only share the best parts of life. Most of us tend to compare our personal, absolute worst with everyone else’s best foot forward. I started the Sunday Confessional not as a way to celebrate mediocrity or to encourage people to fail, but as a way to be honest about life. It’s never magazine perfect or tv tidy. We all have problems that aren’t fixed in thirty minutes and areas of our life that aren’t always perfectly staged for a photo shoot.

People get scared when their life isn’t measuring up to these false ideals. People write me emails, ashamed because they feel they aren’t good enough. I don’t want to contribute to that feeling. I want Home Ec 101 to be a resource no matter where you are on your journey to self-sufficiency and just as an FYI, perfect isn’t even on that map.

The way this works is I share something and then it’s your turn in the comments. It’s okay to be anonymous, just keep it family friendly.

So here goes:

The people who are close to me have been worried about me for a while. “You’re too stressed, Heather,” and yes, they’re right. You see, over the past five years Home Ec 101 slowly turned from a hobby into an actual job and what is slowly, so slowly, evolving into a career -this website isn’t all I do, but it is a hefty portion and the most public part of it. What those of you who don’t know me can’t see is I sweat the details, all of the details, all of the time. Was my tone too snarky? What if the community gets mad at me for for working with [Brand X]? I need to redo all the things right now! Oh no, I had a typo and no one told me. (Email me typo alerts, please, it’s kind of embarrassing to have them pointed out in the comments)

Some might say I’m a bit high strung.

Some might say I’m neurotic, but in a cute and endearing way not the scary way, of course -at least that’s what I hope.

Throw in some stress on a personal level and it really has gotten to be a bit too much.

So what does a work-a-holic do when they need a break from their brain? They start interviewing for a low-stress, part-time gig. (And then they bawl alone in a parking lot because they are “good enough” on the Internet to work with nationally recognized brands, but feel they just bombed an interview for a serving gig.) And then a couple days later they realize they just might be a bit hard on themselves when they find they actually landed said gig.

Starting in a couple of weeks, I’ll be working, very part-time, in my favorite Irish pub. (Some people I know have said I got the gig because I’m a redhead; I would hope it had more to do with the nearly ten years of F&B experience I had prior to having kids.)

Some of you are wondering how a serving gig could possibly be low-stress.

Let’s just say I need some “done” in my life.

As a mother, there’s never “done,” as a home owner, there is ALWAYS stuff I should be doing. As someone who is self-employed and works from home, there is always something more I could be doing to grow, improve, or increase my business.

Three nights a week I will now have a reason to put on make-up and leave the house. I will show up, do my job, and do it well. It may be conceited, but even as I worked my way up in the kitchen, I always waited tables because I was good at it and it brought in good money. At the end of my shift, I will clock out and I will carry home with me an immediate payoff, not only tips, but what they represent: immediate feedback on a job well done. Something I rarely get, as my boss* is very hard to please and knows when I’m phoning it in.

*I’m referring to me, not the one at the pub.

Am I idealizing it? Yes, a little bit. There will be things that go wrong, there will be the occasional table that doesn’t go well, there will be nights with crappy tips, I know this, but this time around, I have a more experienced perspective. It’ll still be a night out of the house that didn’t cost me anything except time and a few hours where I was distracted from the many things that are entirely out of my control.

And? The best part? The very best part of all? I will actually get to talk to adults, on a regular basis, without typing! It’s only been almost 9 years.

So what do you have to get off your chest?

Heather says:

It’s been a few months since we’ve done a Sunday Confessional and I have a deadline causing some serious productive procrastination*, so now is just as good a time as any to bring back the series. For those new to Home-Ec 101, welcome, the Sunday Confessional is just a reminder that life isn’t glossy magazine perfect. Here on the interwebz [sic], it is way too easy to crop the “bad” or “embarrassing” out of the snapshots we choose share. This series isn’t so much a celebration of failure as it is a reminder that we’re all human and we all mess up. Yes, even that stylish lady in the carpool lane who never has a hair out of place. No one has it together all of the time. I know that I personally have spent way too much time, mostly in real life, stressing myself out trying to make everything look 100% ok 100% of the time.

We all have our off days.

The day where we really wish the Fed Ex dude didn’t need a signature because, oh I thought I could put off that shower just until I finished that next project.

The week. . .ok it was two, but I was really sick in the middle of that. . . where all six of us had to use the upstairs bathroom because I couldn’t get my act together enough to finish recaulking the downstairs shower. Which, I should probably also admit that any home project that involves caulk also tends to involve a lot of risque humor, because apparently I still have the mind of a teenager. Snicker snicker, nudge nudge, giggle. No, I really don’t want to grow up. In my defense the shower now looks great, it just took a while to get there.

And then there was last Saturday where I accidentally trapped myself on the roof for a while because I was too chicken to climb back down without anyone holding the ladder. So I sat up on the roof and posted about my predicament on G+. Thankfully my oldest kid wandered back from the neighbor’s where he’d been playing and held the ladder for me, before I actually had to use my phone to do anything productive like call for help.

But really today’s confessional is about onions, a great big pot of onions. I was going to make French onion soup, I had my kitchen clean, I was taking pictures of the process so I could share the recipe here, and then the mail came. In the mail was a package addressed to me. In the package was a chap book, Grab and Go: What to bring when things go really wrong from Streetcar Press. I sat down and started reading, my house filled with the aroma of beautifully caramelizing onions. And then time passed, I finished the book, set it down, and realized the smell had changed slightly -the onions had caramelizing in an enameled cast iron pot in a 400°F oven, a technique I highly recommend, as long as you pay attention. I ran into the kitchen to find I no longer had the beautiful golden brown onions I wanted. Oh no, I had a pot full of charcoal that took a long, long time to scrub clean and no French onion soup, le sigh.

Even good cooks get distracted. Use a timer and don’t have friends send you distracting reading material. Or have the friends send reading material, just save it for when you aren’t in the middle of making dinner.

So, what do you have to get off your chest? The Sunday Confessional is open, just keep it family friendly.

*Productive Procrastination – happens when any job, no matter how distasteful, becomes more urgent and satisfying than the one with the nearest deadline. Want to know if I have a big project stressing me out? Is my house immaculate? Yes? There’s your answer.

Heather says:

Every so often I like to remind Home-Ec 101 readers that life isn’t magazine and snapshot perfect. It’s really easy, when you live your life semi-publicly on the web to only present the best and gloss over the less perfect moments of life.

I work from home, in addition to running this site, Home-Ec 101, I am the Home Channel Editor of BlissfullyDomestic.com, I am the speaker coordinator for the Type-A Parent Conference, I maintain a few other websites, and I volunteer some of my time with Cooking With the Troops.

Two of our kids attend a virtual charter school, which means five days a week, six hours a day are dedicated to their schooling.

My husband works a fun -visualize air quotes here-  schedule known as rotating shifts. Half of his working hours he’s on day shift and the other half he’s on night shift. These shifts are twelve hours long, throw in a commute, a quick session in the gym, and when he’s on, there’s barely time for a, “How was your day?” before he falls into bed.

Life apparently wasn’t full enough, so I decided to take on another big -secret until I sign- project. I’ll replace this with the actual news as soon as I have the all clear.

So, you know what I’ve gone and done?

I’ve hired help with the kids.

I’ll still be home and available as needed, but I’m going to learn to delegate. I have this feeling I’m going to value the fun things more, when they aren’t just another interruption. I’ve been struggling with an emotional funk for a while now and I think maybe it stems from trying to be too many people in the same day.

I knew I was in trouble when a few weeks ago someone mentioned that the cut off for enlisting in the Army is 35 and I just couldn’t stop daydreaming about that idea. If boot camp sounds like a treat, perhaps some things need to change.  Let me phrase it a way those of you who REALLY know me will understand. It’s gotten so bad that I’ve quit cooking and resorted to throwing together casseroles for dinner. Casseroles I have no appetite for. You know it’s not good when I’ve lost my love of food, cooking, and photography.

Perhaps to you, I just sound like another over-privileged woman complaining about first world problems. That’s fine, you’re welcome to your opinion.

However, I’ve decided to take my own advice and cut myself some slack. I don’t have to do it all; perfect isn’t real. I want to continue down this career path that I’ve started and it’s long past time to quit trying to shove it in around the edges before I burn out completely.

So, there you go, no one has it all together all the time, certainly not me.

The Sunday Confessional is open, what do you have to get off your chest?

Heather says:

Sometimes I have to think of what I want to share. You see, there is a fine line between being authentic and admitting I screw up and celebrating mediocrity. Does that make sense to you? I believe that the media, whether it’s television shows or glossy magazines seem to either showcase these unreachable goals or focus on the failure. That’s not the point of this series.

I do this series to as a way to share that we all screw up and I don’t think that’s quite the same as say Jerry Springer. For a long time I struggled, thinking I had to hide every flaw, that if people knew I bickered with my husband, lost my temper, or had days where nothing seemed to go right, that I wasn’t good enough to be liked. A little bit older and a fair bit wiser I know this is patently false and I want you to know it, too.

What have I got for this week?

Friday evening, after circling the Charlotte airport waiting for a thunderstorm to pass, I stood in quite the line for long term parking. On the shuttle a couple of guys were joking that you always think you’ll remember where you left your car. How right they were. I ended up exiting the shuttle two stops too early, which is right when it decided to rain.  That’s fun, right? I finally founnd my car, loaded my suitcase, put the key in the ignition and click.

There are many things I don’t know in life, but I am astute enough to know that clicking is not the best sound. Certainly not at 8pm, in the rain, at the far end of longterm parking.

Guess who forgot to switch the emergency kit to their car, too.

Thankfully the random guy I flagged down to help jump my car was prepared and nice enough to help me push my car out of the parking spot so we could jump it. Thank you again, whoever you are.

Want a bonus confession?

My suitcase is still sitting in the garage. After my four hour stormy drive home, I just fell into bed. I suppose I’ll get to it today, but I’m not promising. I’ve found if I unpack immediately, without passing go, without collecting $200, it gets done. Otherwise? It’ll get unpacked as I need things.

What about you? What do you have to share this Memorial Day Weekend.

Heather says:

It has been a while since I ran this series on Home-Ec 101. I started the Sunday Confessional a few years ago as a way for us to come to grips that our lives aren’t magazine perfect, a place to embrace our foibles and get over ourselves. We’re all human; yes, even that lady in the car pool line whose make up is always flawless. I promise, she’s got her own baggage. Life isn’t as perfect as we like to pretend. Television sets standards most of us will never attain and no one’s home is always pristine, unless they can afford staff -or are a bit OCD and live alone.

What’s my confession for this week?

I’m skipping church. I know that doesn’t sound so bad, but oh just wait for the reason. Yesterday afternoon all the kids were playing with the neighbor kid* across the street. Unfortunately my daughter got too close when one of the kids was swinging a bat. It caught her in the cheek, I took her in and got an x-ray to be on the safe side, thankfully nothing is broken. “Ice and Motrin” said the doc, “and it’s going to look a lot worse over the next few days.” She wasn’t kidding and that’s the reason I’m reluctant to go to church this morning. For some reason most of us don’t bat** an eye when a boy shows up with the occasional obvious bump or bruise, but dainty little  girls? And there you have it, I’m not going because I’m neurotic and worried about what others think.

Last week I asked on Facebook, if you wanted me to bring back this weekly series and the majority who responded said yes. So don’t make stand out here all by myself, what do you have to get off your chest. If it makes you feel any better, I’ve been slacking on keeping up my office, too. This room is in a pretty sad state. My goal for today is to get it back in order, since I have all that extra time on my hands.

*It was just an accident and we’re all still good friends.
**See what I did there?

The Home-Ec 101 Forums have been relaunched. Head over there and say hello.

Heather says:

As usual I used Random.org to pick this week’s winner and it was lucky commenter number 1 aka Jenny. Jenny Jenny I got your number, check your email, I’ll be looking for your address to mail you my review copy of Food & Wine’s Reinventing the Classics.

This week’s Sunday confessional?

Mostly I just want to know why minor calamities always happen thirty seconds before company arrives? My 7yo knocked over the jar of enchilada sauce I was saving for tonight’s dinner over when he went into the refrigerator for a glass of milk. 3 cups of tomatoey, chili powdery sauce all over both the interior and exterior of the fridge, the wall and the floor.

Naturally there was a knock on the door just as I was elbow deep into the clean up.

Does this happen in your house to, or am I just lucky?

The actual confession, it’s not a big one, but the don’t have to be. I’m just grateful for the neighbor kids and friends who come over and distract my kids so it’s not Mom, mom, mommy, mama all the live-long day.

What about you? Anything to get off your chest?

Heather says:

The Sunday Confessional here at Home Ec 101 is a chance to quit hiding our imperfections. No one is perfect, no matter what the media wants us to believe. I have a few this week.

I went to bed early last night, determined to catch up on sleep. Yes, I know you can’t actually catch up, but I’ve been running on too little for a few weeks now. I completely forgot about setting the clocks back until I noticed people fussing on Twitter this morning.

Nice. Actually, it was REALLY nice.

I completely forgot to do Retro Saturday. Oops. Also, I didn’t even think about it until I was halfway through this post.

If you didn’t change your smoke alarm batteries in October, please do so today. Or you can spend the next few weeks wandering from room to room trying to figure out which one is chirping every so often. -This is not the recommended method.-

Did you know you’re supposed to vacuum smoke alarms monthly?

Did you know that smoke alarms are happy hiding places for small spiders?

Did you know that spiders can set off smoke alarms?

Yeah, I missed the small print on the underside of our smoke alarms, too.

Finally, there is a giant stock pot of potato salad in my garage refrigerator that is going to be thrown out. I was told to make enough potato salad for 60 people. Just as an FYI if you’re ever asked to bring potato salad for sixty, that’s tripling the potato salad recipe) It was pretty chilly so turnout was light and most of the people at the event were kids, who as a rule don’t touch potato salad. So two-thirds of it was left untouched. I like potato salad, but there is no way I’m going to eat twelve pounds of it over the next few days. Someone help me not feel guilty.

How about you? What do you have to get off your chest?